When I think about being a barber, making my living off the scuzzy heads of the general public, going further into debt for this endeavor, it makes me apprehensive. It's not like I can jump into this and then decide it's not for me. I've come too far down too many wrong paths to keep making wrong turns. I know I've always enjoyed giving my friends mohawks, but something tells me I wouldn't get the same sense of joy from giving a cop a buzz cut. Then again, I'd have the opportunity to gump (*see footnote) a cop. Hmmm...I'm suddenly encouraged again. Thanks, blog.
Sadly, this blog might be the only thing keeping me going, on all fronts.
I mean, I'd hate to be seen as a hypocrite on anything as permanent and quintessential to life as a blog on the internet by quitting during the preliminary stages of my journey, but it's not like I need to prove anything to myself. The biggest things I feel like I've finished that I've started is my education, a novel, two novellas, and a handful of short stories. Maybe, what's really keeping me going is that I have more stories to write. Hell, Christ had his moment of doubt too.
Based on my previous posts, I should be humble and say that barbering will be a great opportunity and then add some cliche about an honest day's work and there's worse ways to make a living, etc, ad nauseum. I've done a lot of things in my life, and none of it suits me. Like Bartleby the scribner said, "I prefer not."
What's so upsetting to me, is that I wouldn't care if I only made minimum wage as long as I was doing something that I'm passionate about. E.g. working for a publisher or marketing firm where part of my responsibility is cleaning the toilet and lick shining the boss's shoes. Coffee anyone? Have I already used the joke, perhaps I should go get a master's in Writing? Should I go back for a marketing degree, then back for a graphic design degree, then do a yearlong, voluntary internship with a company in the fucking midwest? Then could I make minimum wage using my degree, could I please?
At least I'm confident that after I go through this barbering program, I'll be able to get a job in the field, considering I don't gump too many people. What else am I going to do?
Just to keep you all abreast, I submitted a copy of the sheepskin to the adviser, so he can waive my admission test. The question is: will he contact me and let me know when he's received it and filled out the necessary forms, or will I have to do more of the footwork for the opportunity to hand his company six thousand dollars? Stay tuned.
*Footnote*
gump: verb, to gump, to have been gumped; the act of giving or receiving a haircut in which the stylist, through inept ability with sheers, raises the neckline back and forth in an effort to get it even until the hair is removed halfway up the head, making the recipient look like Forrest Gump.
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